pietro crespi and the sad waltzes

I feel like its almost too close to home. I just feel like I've been given way too many chances and I'm so undeserving of any attention I receive. I don't know what to do. I'm confused. How many times can I fuck up? Let's start counting.

If I had known it was harmless, I would've killed it myself.

One of these days, I'll make some money and buy myself those things that I want, like acrylic paint, and acoustic guitar strings, maybe a new bicycle seat for when I ride over to your house each night. One of these days, I'll get a real job one that actually pays, like my dad had. You know my father, the bartender, used to wear a suit to work, before hitting the drink, the old man used to do a lot of things.

whatever it is you think you are, you aren't.
a good friend
unique
well read
good looking
smart
well, now you know.
I hate to be the one, to bear such bad news, I know it hurts to hear, but its true
you dont mean anything to anyone but me
well, now you know.
free beer and basement shows dont mean you made it
its what you do
not who you were
what you wore
where you been
whoever you think is watching you dance from across the room
they arent
if anything they feel sorry for you, because you try so hard
i know its hurts to hear, but its the truth
so you might as well hear it from a friend
you're a has-been
that never was
i know its mean to say, but its something ive been meaning to say to you
for a while
you're a has-been
that never was
and won't be